My day was very strange in many ways. I gave you an example of what a day with me would look like at this point in my life. I forgot one thing.
I was pulling into a parking space at Curves. I needed to pull out again because the angle of my car was wrong. I slowly pushed on reverse. I never push down hard when I am close to something or in a tight space – going forwards or backwards. I was astonished when the car jumped forwards. I had not put the car into reverse. This has rarely ever happened. I’m careful. I have fairly good reflexes and was able to stop the car well before we even came close to the large circular cement encasing for the light pole. I had not pushed down hard, yet the car jumped forwards and items fell to the floor.
The poor gentleman parked nearby certainly was startled. I don’t blame him. He must have wondered why I did that. It’s a mystery to me. Here is another interesting tidbit: When I came out of Curves, an hour later, the same man was there. He had been holding a clipboard before I went into Curves and he was still holding the clipboard – It was almost as if he had never put it down. I figured that he had to use the clipboard for some reason in the feed store. It didn’t make sense that he still had the clipboard. It didn’t make sense that he was still in the parking lot. He, for some strange reason was observing me. I’m tired of being observed.
I can tell when someone is going to be watching me. I just can. The person has to see where I am so that he or she can watch what I am doing. I see it. The quick shift of the eyes or slight move of the head to look my way. Yep, I do. I can also tell when a person is trying to watch me out of the corner of their eye. When you successfully look out of the corner of your eye, the focus is not on what you are “looking at”. No, your focus stays looking straight ahead and you just have a somewhat blurred view of what your “subject” or “target” is doing. I don’t hesitate to look to see if someone is trying to look at me. This has probably been one of my downfalls. You see, if I dare look at someone you think is inappropriate in any way, the rumor mill starts up all over again. I’m never cleared. No one even keeps track that I have reacted to all groups, zero times.